Let me know, my lover,
When I need to go, my dear.
I love you so,
but I can’t be the woman of your dreams.

Love is beautiful.
It comes in many shapes and forms.
Love is unique,
For me, there are no templates on repeat.

I’ve shed my skin,
I’ve looked within
And shattered my very core.

I won’t back down,
I can’t stop now.
I’m free.

Your amorous canvas is set,
Already painted red.
Your pigment choice is bold
Which retail selection, holiday collection
Was your inspo board?

Let’s try something new
A deconstruction tool.
No, that’s not what I mean.
Just breathe and
Take a moment to connect.

I’ll add some black, some splotches of green.
What will we create?
You try now.
Mountains sturdy and sound.
Our creation has grown.

The symbols well round,
Show our foundation.
Strong, living, allied.

Let me know, my lover,
Do I need to go, my friend?
I can love you, but not the way you dream.

I look at you and I feel a flutter.

You look back and it’s gone.

But it was beautiful while it lasted.

You were a mountain of words and primal beauty.

You were a dream until you looked at me.

Until you saw me with Eros filled eyes and expectations.

When you saw that I was a real person.

You noted that I existed and that I was the artist and the canvas;

The student willing to learn.

But you wanted me to guide you. You needed me to lead you.

And I was not placed here to be your instructor.

I was not put here to be on the pedestal above you.

I am your peer. We grow together.

We learn.

We explore.

We process the hard words, the concepts that don’t make sense because “Why can’t we just love for sake of being a person, a place, or a thing with value.”

Why is it not liberating? We should feel our deliverance when we utter those words, not the feeling that everything is dependent and repressive.

Love is power.

Love is strength.

Love is real life magic.

Love comes in many shapes and forms just like the people that walk this earth.

Love is a -romantic.

Love is alterous.

Love is fire and passion that is that moment, not forever.

Love is that flutter while it last and you are responsive and thankful.

“Praise be!” you shout from the only place that you understand.

Your unfamiliarity? Your unawareness?

Fuck! You have made me a goddess.

Another pedestal I will fall from.

But it was beautiful while it lasted.

 

I have a voice and it is loud.

Some people don’t like because I have learned to be proud.

I like my voice, well I do now.

I like my voice because I now I stand up fo me.

I will not allow you to push me into your box.

So that means I am not humble.

I am not humble and I will gladly take it.

I am not humble because I fought and found value in myself and my words.

I am not humble because I developed a sense of dignity.

I have a voice and all you wanted me to have was a meager sense of self when you said it was ok to speak as long it was in alliance with your view.

And no I do not accept your view.

I do not accept you objectification, erasure, or manipulation.
I do not accept your worship that says so you should die.

I do not accept you “well meaning” prayers or blessing to purge me of my demons, because of those demons, that sin is my light.

I bask in that glory.

I will be loud and proud and when you try to bury me, I will climb high and shout from the rooftops I have to.

I am here.

I am here.

I am here and you will hear me.